OFW Domestic Helper's Fate - Real Encounter

In the hope of making the ends meet, most of the pinays (women from the Philippines) had chosen to give their family a greener grass by working abroad as domestic helpers mostly destined to Gulf countries.

Poverty is pushing them to set foot on the foreign lands, alone.

No Broken Promises Please!

Recruitment agencies in the Philippines are encouraging and ensuring good employers in Gulf countries, exclusive rooms in their employers' houses, enough food, free personal stuff and one holiday every month.

In reality?

When we arrive in our employers' houses, good to those whose employers follow all that's in the contract.

Mostly, don't!

No exclusive bedroom.

Some sleep in the open sala, where few rape cases occur.

The victims are staying silent in fear of threat while others had chosen to run away from their employers' houses.

Some are not given enough food.

I once saw a domestic helper climbing a hair-raising steep ladder.

"I packed some food for our fellow domestic helpers next door," she said. "They just eat from a little food their madame usually give them. Not even allowed a chance to get to their employers' kitchen to have their food heated."

Though it is in the contract that employers should give free personal stuff for their domestic helpers, most didn't care, so we give money to our employers to buy us our personal needs because we don't have holidays and not even allowed to get out nor buy something from the nearest store, afraid that domestic helpers might run away.

A Post From a Domestic Helper On Facebook:

"Ana wahid san'ah khalas shugol Kuwait fulos mafi. Eji salary sawi lablab shweya baden hawal Filibin

Ana panty kulo karban shuno hadha

Mushkila kadama khalas kontrata panty baad khalas

Kaliwali panty Baclaran fi tatlo bente."

Translation: [I finished a year, working in Kuwait without money. I could just kiss my salary then send to the Philippines immediately. Undies all worn out! ???? What's this? Contract ends, undies too? Never mind, in Baclaran (a specific place in the Philippines) there are 3 for 20 pesos.]

Funny but really happened to some, specially those who have no day-offs and had not brought many undies from the Philippines before flight.

Have You Tried Wearing Trousers With Ripped Crotch Area?

Definitely! Hands up!

I was one of those who have them when I was in Kuwait.

No matter how many times we sew, they keep on ripping.

Specially to those who are car washers at the same time.

It's when we lift a leg to climb and reach the roof of whatever car models our employers own that makes our pajamas down there gets torn.

I usually wear shorts under the pajamas so, no worries!

Do You Think We Are Boutique Models?

By just looking at uploaded photos on social media, families and relatives in the Philippines think that they look fairer than before, stress-free, worry-free, always happy.

One could think we might build a boutique when we go back to the Philippines because of the variety of clothes we put on.

In reality, almost all domestic helpers are deprived of enough sleep, became pale which makes the skin look fair.

Hairs are falling with the dandruff and hands got calluses.

We usually tease each other saying, "Eye bags for sale!"

Compliments to the photo editor app!

Before I forget, those dresses we are wearing on photos are our employers' dresses.

Some were given.

Others are for pictorial purposes only (with and/or without permission).

Think for a second before asking us to send those clothes and accessories unto you!

We Are Not an ATM Dispensing Undepleted Money!

Don't rush when asking or borrowing money as if you made us keeper of your own wealth!

Most employers procrastinate in sending salaries to the Philippines.

Yes, we had lots of money but already sent.

Nothing's left but a single receipt to be used in the next transaction.

I never mentioned names so if you got hit, just don't defend yourselves by reacting.

We Are Not Robots!

Domestic helpers are persons with emotions too.

We feel tired, lonely, empty and sad.

Employers usually tell us to work in a hurry without even thinking that cleaning takes time.

When we do tasks early and fast, they would tell us to clean again.

"They're not cleaned well."

I remembered my Qatari madame wanted me to clean their room in 5 minutes.

"In 5 minutes, you should finish cleaning the room thoroughly, with master bed moved, things dusted, vacuumed once, mopped twice and things in proper order!"

OMG! Only a superwoman could do this instantly.

"Madame, even machines get damaged when over used!"

Unless we can't get up, even in sickness we are not excused from doing our job.

Our butts yet reach the floor to sit awhile, one of our employers would ask if we're free.

Shall we lie?

What excuse could we probably say?

Don't Make Us Look Like A Scarecrow!

Jealous female employers usually buy extra large uniforms and undies for their household helpers.

I experienced this.

It's as if they had not seen how petite I am.

Instead of buying size 36 uniforms, they bought size 40.

"Madame, you are beautiful. Why are you so insecure?"

Who Are Confused?

Domestic helpers have lots of confusing tasks.

Whether we do the do's and avoid the don'ts, if our employers are naggers, we get nagged.

We got no safe side.

My Qatari madame usually had tantrums.

She roared like a lion each morning when she had not slept enough that night.

Then, would go here and there visiting relatives, friends and all.

"Why won't you just get enough sleep and oh, don't bother to wake up!"

If we defend ourselves, the arguments heat up.

Mostly, we just go with the flow and just bend the least ego we have during these times.

We just break down and cry.

Is There A Job With Almost 24 Hours Service?

Domestic helpers almost work 24 hours a day specially those who don't have exclusive rooms and those whose sleeping areas are the employer's living rooms.

Why?

It's because visitors usually went off their houses 1 am to 2 am and the bachelor sons of our employers usually arrive home 4 am to 5 am.

Sometimes, employers wake us up at dawn to do anything they would want us to do and most of the time we can't sleep back.

Having employers with extended families is the most tiresome one.

It's as if the domestic helper has no time to sit back even for a while to relax.

Supposedly, when the sons and/or daughters of the employers settle down though still living in the employer's rooms with their children, should not be part of their parent's domestic helper's responsibilities anymore.

They should have their own domestic helper or at least, they should work themselves if they can't afford to have one.

But that's not the case.

In fact, when we finish doing our responsibilities in their parent's house or even not yet, they would take us to their (those who are living in another flats or houses) sister's or brother's houses to clean, to babysit, to serve the visitors on special occasions or to do whatever tasks they would want us to do.

Some usually pay in thanksgiving, but others are not!

Not even a free lunch!

Not even a "thank you"!

And will be sent back to their parents' houses late at night without lunch.

Who wants to eat well when too tired?

I usually eat lunch and dinner together, if not, at least drink a glass of milk then sleep.

Take note of the time almost 2 am.

Who wants to eat more before sleeping from the tiresome activities during the day?

When our employers visit from one house to another, they usually talk about their domestic helpers.

One time I was serving tea when I heard one of the employers in the circle was telling others that her household helper has no work at her house and just playing with mobile.

"Oh really? Won't you just spend the salary for her to your beauty products instead of paying her for not doing a job?"

How Stable Are Our Guards From Homesickness?

If all domestic helpers had been immune to homesickness, we couldn't have heard the news about those who jumped down from the top of their employers' houses from among us.

No matter what the reasons behind the said incidents may be, committing suicide is never an answer and will never be an answer to anything that is bothering us.

There are different ways we could do to stop the chances of homesickness and negativity of getting inside our minds.

One of which is making ourselves so busy so that by the time our backs touch our beds we could sleep at once without thinking about everything.

Almost all of us get into social media apps for fun i.e joining Facebook, getting into chat rooms and talking to other people from around the world.

In doing so, some of us developed strong attachment to those people we chat with most of the time and the feeling of being cared which is commonly misinterpreted as "love".

It's when communication from our loved ones in the Philippines became scarce that made us look for other people to talk to.

Just a pastime but seriously changed most of domestic helpers' lives.

Some get inspiration and motivation while others heartaches or worse, broken family ties.

Let us judge not, for we have not gotten into their shoes and have proven to reach as far as where they are now without even being tempted to give up.

We Love The Children We Foster.

Spending time with our employers' children made special bond that would make their parents so jealous of our closeness.

When those children preferred to be with us than with them, when they witness how their children hug and kiss us not them, they feel happy with a pinch of little regret.

The regret of being so busy for their children's future and not being physically available for their children most of the time.

Same thing domestic helpers who have children in the Philippines are feeling.

Sometimes, when we miss our real children, we just hug and kiss our employers' children and we get kissed and hugged in return.

When I was in Qatar, Hamad, the Kuwaiti little boy I fostered called me over (his new nanny) Jessielyn's phone.

He asked where I was, what I was doing and bade me to come and play Call of Duty (one of the PlayStation games) with him.

He even told me to hurry, as if I was just a room away.

Recently, he called me over (his latest nanny) Daisy's phone and told me again to come over there.

It was Almost 4 years ago since I was with him, still he remembers me.

Lulu, the Qatari brat, told me to bring her with me to the agency when I told her mom that I want to go back to the agency to have a new employer.

Her mom who was shouting and nagging at me at that time, paused for a while and took his daughter inside their room.

My current employers' grandchildren usually look for me every time they come to visit.

Their aunts who usually get jealous, try to influence them by giving them candies and chocolates to get inside their rooms but the children most of the time insist in going to the laundry room where I usually hide.

There was one time, when I was wearing abaya, Aboodi (my employers' grandchild) asked if I will go back to the Philippines that day.

I lied and said, "Yes."

I giggle looking at his reaction.

He is almost crying and his eyes are just fixed on me and on what I was doing that time.

I saw his mom coming and I didn't want him to cry so I told him the truth that I was just about to go out to have my brace tightened and I'm not going back to the Philippines yet.

His mom laughed at his reaction too then insured him that I will be back in the evening.

Enough of the Bad News Please...

Families, relatives and friends should not always tell us about bills and problems at home.

Share some good news most of the time instead.

We experience more problems and trials here alone in the foreign land and be told with more problems there in the Philippines would be like adding insult to an injury.

This cause our minds block sometimes.

Happiness is...?

Going home and being with our loved ones.

Sleeping in lieu of all the sleepless nights and energy-draining job.

My sincere condolences to the bereaved families of OFWs who returned in the Philippines yet sealed in rectangle boxes.

Yes, not all OFWs return home safe and sound.

I feel sad to those domestic helpers whose neighbors felt bad when denied of party, drinks, chocolates and all.

"Wait! Way back when they asked you for help, did you ever give a cent?"

My message to all domestic helpers nationwide:

We don't need to settle down like a mother bird leaving its birdies from dusk till dawn when we can work from home and earn a passive income.

Click here ===> explore great possibilities


Are you a domestic helper too? How's your experience? Comment below and expect a response in minutes.